Constipated people don’t give a crap.
Practice safe sex, go screw yourself.
Please tell your pants it’s not polite to point.
If that phone was up your butt, maybe you could drive a little better.
Thank you for pot smoking.
If at first you don’t succeed … blame someone else and seek counseling.
Impotence: Nature’s way of saying, “No Hard Feelings”.
If you can read this, I’ve lost my trailer.
The earth is full – Go home
I have the body of a God … Buddha
So many pedestrians – So little time
Cleverly disguised as a Responsible Adult
Honk if anything falls off
He who hesitates is not only lost … but miles from the next exit
Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?
I haven’t lost my mind, it’s backed up on disk somewhere
Body by Nautilus; Brain by Mattel
Boldly going nowhere
Don’t be sexist – Broads hate that
Heart attacks … God’s revenge for eating His animal friends
Honk if you’ve never seen an Uzi fired from a car window
How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost?
If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets
Saw it … Wanted it … Had a fit … Got it!
WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition.